Walking in the Shadows
by SunflowerWielder
Summary: Challenge from Dawn.Fire.Angel. Lightning let him slip through her fingers, and get caught by a Miss Fleuret - Now a Mrs Caelum. What would have happened if she had been honest? T for language. StellaXNoctis, LightningXNoctis


**Hola!**

**This is a challenge story by .Angel:**

**Lightning's thoughts fanfic - she ponders on her life after letting Noctis slip through her fingers and be caught by a Miss Fleuret (now Mrs. Caelum - sorry Yuki!). She wonders what would've happened if she hadn't let him go. She takes a walk (anywhere) and meets Noctis, and they talk to each other, Lightning being all uptight and stuff. You decide on the ending - happy or sad? Rating: (if you want lemons) K+ to M**

**So here it is: T for language. Not a very happy story, I'm afraid. I tried to put Lightning and Noctis in character as best as I could, but they still might be a little OOC. I hope you like it Dawn!**

* * *

_**Caelum/Fleuret**_

_**The Prince of Tenebrea, Noctis Lucis Caelum tied the knot with Stella Nox Fleuret today, in a magnificent ceremony –**_

I threw the newspaper down and sat down, glaring at it.

It had been a month since I saw that newspaper, a month since he married that bitch. And I couldn't damn well stop reading that article, feeling a pain in my chest every time I re-read it.

I hated Noctis when I first met him. He was arrogant, overbearing, a know it all with no sense of boundaries.

And then I started to spend more time with him, because of the crystals.

The reason for all his arrogance wasn't because he was a prince – it was because he was shy.

Then there was that one, stupid night, fuelled by alcohol and anger. That one night that we both agreed meant nothing, it was just a mistake. A blip.

I should have told him the truth; it did mean _something_ to me, I just wasn't sure what.

But I hadn't. Because I was scared – He was making me feel, and I hated it. It terrified me.

I wanted him next to me, but I needed him as far away from me as possible.

So I ignored my heart and lied.

And then he met her.

Stella Nox Fleuret. The perfect princess, blonde hair, big hazel eyes, perfect manners. Of course he'd fall in love with her. Half the men who meet her end up head over heels. Even Snow thought she was wonderful.

Why I didn't see it coming is beyond me. But I know I'll never get that picture of them kissing out of my head.

I'm the one alone, with no-one to talk to once the sun goes down, I'm the one who's suffering. Because of my own stupidity.

It's all my fault.

I stood up to grab the newspaper, and walked over to the bin, ready to drop it in. To leave it all behind me.

I can't. I can't get rid of the guilt that follows me around all the time.

With a sigh, I put the paper back on the table, so I'll see it again first thing in the morning, to remind me of my mistake.

Noctis and I were a faerie tale, one that would never come true.

Noctis and Stella were an inevitable fairy tale.

The phone rang suddenly, piercing the silence. I let the answer phone get it. I haven't been in the mood to talk to anyone lately. I think Snow wants to take me to the doctors. He thinks I'm depressed.

He's not far off the mark.

"_**Light, it's me, Snow. Where the hell are you? I haven't seen you for weeks... Vanille and I will come around later tonight, okay?"**_

Snow hung up, obviously to phone Vanille, so they could come around and 'cheer me up'.

I need a walk.

* * *

The city's empty apart from the occasional vandal and druggie.

The sky's starless, just a moon and dark clouds throwing shadows everywhere.

What if I had told him? Would we have ever gotten together, or would I have been thrown aside, banished with a few harsh words?

No, he said it meant nothing to him, so I know the answer to that.

Forget the past. The past cannot be changed, no matter what. Look to the future, that can be changed, so can the present.

I am happy for him. Congratulations Noctis. Well done. I'm happy for you both –

Who am I kidding? Not me, that's for sure. I hate Stella.

Not the bitter ex-girlfriend hate that's on those soap operas Vanille likes watching, just a loathing for everything she stands for. She's the perfect princess who everyone adores, who looks down on me and my friends, what we stand for. We're the people who were rejected by the world, so we rejected it.

We're friends though, me and Noctis. That's better than nothing.

But then how can I get over him if he's still in my life? I want him in my life – but I need him out of it.

This is so confusing. I _hate_ this, screw what the damn pop songs and fairy tales say!

Being in love is horrible, it's confusing and terrifying. You have no control over it, and hiding it doesn't help.

With a plant or a human, cut off the air supply and it will die.

With love, it'll continue to grow, no matter what you do to get rid of it.

I hate this, I hate that damn arrogant prince, that stupid blonde princess, and I hate myself for feeling this way!

"Hey stranger."

My head shot up at the sound of a voice I know all too well.

Noctis.

I don't know why the prince is in the city at eleven o'clock at night.

I haven't seen him in almost two months. I suppose I was trying to avoid him.

There's no hiding now though – I'm in the middle of an empty street with him.

"Congratulations." The word came out of my mouth bitterly, harsh. Noctis noticed, raising an eyebrow.

"You heard?" He asked. Of course, the raised eyebrow wasn't because of my tone, he was surprised I had heard the news.

"Newspaper article."

"Oh," He sounded downbeat, there was a pause. "Thanks." He added, responding to my fake congratulations.

"No problem."

Silence fell.

I can't stand this. I used to be able to talk to Noctis, and now because of a stupid ceremony, a piece of paper and a ring, I can't think of anything to say. I need to get out.

"See you." I turned to walk away, to try and leave him behind. Fingernails suddenly dig into my arm. I scowled, spinning around to face Noctis. "What are you-?"

"Lightning, if we've had a fight, can you at least tell me about it?" Noctis pleaded. I blinked, surprised to hear someone, a prince that's feared by so many people pleading.

"Nothing's happened." Damn it, he's got sharp fingernails. "I just need to go."

"Bullshit!" My eyebrows rose at his curse. Noctis often says that swearing is for those with a limited vocabulary. "I haven't seen you in two months, and we used to meet up every few days."

"Let go of me Noctis." I hissed, pulling back, making him dig his nails in harder. "I mean it, let me go!"

"Not until you tell me what's going on." He said, locking onto my eyes like a missile.

"Nothing is going on, let me go!"

"You're a crap liar." He waited for my next denial, so I stayed silent. "Is it to do with Stella?"

"No!" I glared at him, feeling all the hurt and pain he's caused me erupt. "You stupid arrogant prince, you think everything revolves around you and your dumb whore, without giving a second thought to what other people think or feel! I have a heart, and I do feel things that _don't_ have to do with your actions, or your bitch!"

My face stung as his fist collided with my cheek. Startled, I fell backwards, his nails ripping the skin on my arm as I went down.

"Sorry." He muttered, as I checked my arm. Five streaks of blood ran down it. He knelt down next to me. "Just don't say those things about Stella again." My eyes locked onto his.

They were the glistening yellow that I'd come to associate with him. The problem with yellow eyes is that they are impossible to read. I wish I knew what you were thinking.

"Do you love her?" Noctis looked up from my arm and stared at me. "Do you love her?" I repeated. He said nothing, instead he felt in his pockets. After a moment, he pulled out a potion and wordlessly pushed it towards me. I picked it up but didn't take it. He eventually spoke.

"I think so."

"Think so?" Part of me leaps at the chance, that maybe it's not all over, that I might not have lost. But the other part is so tired of this cat and mouse game. My heart thuds like I've been running for miles when all I'm doing is sitting in the middle of the street.

"It's not the same with Stella." He's not speaking to me, he's thinking out loud. My wish has come true, but in the worst way. "But yes. I am in love with her." He spoke slowly, and nodded. "I'm sure of it now. I do love her."

My grip loosens on the potion and it falls to the ground with a soft thud. Noctis doesn't notice.

"I need to head back." He said after a minute. "Are you going to be okay getting home? I can get one of the others to drive you back." I shake my head.

"I'll be fine." I lied again. I can't stop doing that to him. I want to tell him the truth, but the truth is just another faerie tale. He stood up and started to walk into the night. "Noctis?" He stopped. "What do you mean, 'Not the same'?"

Silence falls again, and I wonder if I shouldn't have asked.

"... There was someone else." He whispered into the air. "But she didn't feel the same. She didn't know." And then he's gone, vanished into the night where he belongs.

Realisation hits me like a punch in the stomach.

"_She didn't feel the same. She didn't know."_

_He__ didn't feel the same. __He__ didn't know._

The tears race down my face before I can stop them.

I had you Noctis. And then I let you go.

I will never forgive myself.

You love her now. You don't love me anymore.

And here and now is all that matters.

I had my chance with you, and I blew it. This is Stella's chance, Stella's time. Maybe she'll be smarter than me. She might not fuck up the way I did. And in a way, I wish her luck. I want you to be happy with me, but if you're happy with her, then I'll just have to move on, as hard as it is.

But the hunter in me can't accept this. Maybe Stella will mess up, and the hunter in me is clinging onto that hope. Because if she ever does, I'll be waiting.

I think I'm going insane. You told me once that being a prince was a curse, and so many people say there are two Noctis'. The cold hearted, distant prince, and the happy man who loves his friends.

You've transferred that curse to me. There are two me's and neither of them are winning. I'm losing this battle.

What else can I do but pretend that I'm okay?

* * *

Snow and Vanille were there when I got back.

They were full of questions as usual: "Where were you?" "What happened to your arm?" "Why have you got a bruise on your cheek?" "Have you been crying?"

I just shrugged. I don't trust my mouth anymore. It screwed up, along with my brain and heart.

Vanille sorted out my arm and Snow loudly complained about Gadot dropping the machine gun on his foot that morning.

They both fell asleep on my sofa. I can't sleep though... Every time I shut my eyes, I see his. I just want them to vanish; I'm so tired of this game.

I want to go back to reality, instead of being stuck in this warped faerie tale.

We both lied in the end, because we were both too scared. I guess Stella's braver than I ever was.

I smiled down at the newspaper article in my hand. Stella and Noctis smiled back at me, awkwardly.

He never did photograph well.

I threw it in the bin with a clang. Vanille woke up.

"What was that?" She asked sleepily.

I looked up at her, the empty smile still on my face.

"Nothing important."

_Another lie won't do any harm._

* * *

**Just a little note: I prefer the spelling 'Faerie' to 'Fairy'. 'Faerie' sounds darker more like a LightningXNoctis thing, whereas I associate 'Fairy' with the pastal winged people in children's books, more like StellaXNoctis. **

**And I do hate Stella, so I apologise for putting Noctis with her!**

**Song of the moment: Love Story by Taylor Swift. (I've been listening to this all the time while I wrote this)**

**Review please!**

**I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH!!! (But not in a creepy way!)**


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